icing on the cake.

Well you wouldn't believe what I woke up to this morning.  Ash, the girl I just kicked to the curb, texted me 'I miss you.'   and she texted it 4 times, until i responded.  I said 'it'll pass' and she asked 'why are you being like that?'

I was a little in shock over the situation.  I didn't even know how I should respond, coldly or nicely.  I wanted to just shake her and say WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?  YOU'RE CRAZY!!!  But I couldn't do that.  But I mean, just three days ago she left in the middle of the night so fast that it made my head spin, and the day after that she was trying to put me down by saying 'i bet you're not even a lesbian' and to lose her number, and now she's saying she misses me.  I feel bad for the girl.  She obviously has a lot of issues that I don't even know how to begin to try to break down, but I know I can't be the person that helps her.  She doens't miss me, she misses the idea of having someone, which is something that I miss too, but luckily I know the difference at this point. 

I told her she's got to be kidding me, and she said that she just wanted me to know she was sorry.  I told her it was fine but that I'm done.  She texted me an hour later saying 'talk to me'.  I then had to put my foot down and tell her she needed to stop, that I was done.  I seriously hate hurting people, especially when I know a little about her past and what she's been through (not a whole lot of good) but I just can't be the person who fixes everyone else.  I've tried that, and learned the hard way that it doesn't work. 

Today is my little sister's 22nd birthday, and we're all going out to dinner tonight.  I've been stuck in the house for 3 days being sick, and I'm really looking foward to getting out.  I think I really need it at this point, I'm feeling kinda depressed, and even when I feel just a little bit more on the sour side than the sweet side, it takes a big tole on me.  We're going to a hibatchi place, I guess it's become a tradition for her birthday for the past few years.  My dad and evil stepmother are going, which means they're footing the bill, which I have NOOOOOO problem with lol.  Hellooo pitchers of sake with plum wine!!  Should be fun, our cousin is coming and some of sissy's friends.